My Fat Fingers

Good day all.

I'm new to the site here and what I've seen is pretty damn good.
I'm 43, I started to play when I was a 8 but gave up after a year due to parents financial situation. Picked up a guitar when I was 16 to try again and had no structured practice just goofing around so I never really learned anything. Now that my daughter has shown interest in guitar I picked up mine and now realize the situation with my fingers.
My question is,
what my problem is and I can't seem to get around it is my fingers have a strange shape to them, where as the spot where my fingerprint is in the middle of my finger, my finger actually comes to a point there and I cannot fret one string without touching the adjacent higher string.
Also in order to get a clean sound from the string I have to press it down so hard on the fretboard t the point where I leave string dents in my fingertips making them numb, there by touching the adjacent string even further. This is very bothersome to me. Especially when I see people playing and it looks like they are barely touching the string to the fret. I love to play but when I actually do I usually get frustrated now and give up within 15 minutes. I need to find a way to get around this so I can play like I would like to. What really gets me is when I see these guitarists my size, Lifeson, Gilmour, Darrel Abbott and the like I can't see why I have such a problem with my fingers.

Any body, any suggestions???