Help With Song Structure!, All help appreciated! Options

[TylerT]

Hey guys, this is a new song I wrote today!

I feel like I got into a solid groove while recording and
everything has been going well, but now that I've got enough licks down,
I need some help with song structure, mainly the licks at 1:44 and 3:17 (im thinking about removing the one at 3:17)

There are a lot of recurring themes throughout as well!

Thanks in advance!

http://soundcloud.com/tylerteeple/new-song-rough

[Ivan Milenkovic]

This is an excellent song man, there are some great ideas here The problem I see is there are no vocals! If you want to make it into instrumental, you should consider having one lead line throughout the song that will replace the vocal line (like in 3.35 when the lead starts) I think you started nicely with one lead line (0.45), but the problem is, it's a bit scooped, perhaps with more mids it will sound good. This lead line should be simple and catchy, just like the vocals, not complicated.

So far, the song seems like a good background for the lead line. Only reason why it sounds a bit repetitive here and there is because you used possibly a bit too much of the main riff in the middle of the song. Inserting different variations in harmony can sound cool, to break the routine.

As for the end, there's nothing "wrong" there, the arrangement is interesting and busy, but the energy build up happened quickly (around 3.17) and lasts until the end of the song. You should consider inserting another quite part there, and let your song "breathe" a bit.

This post has been edited by Ivan Milenkovic: Jan 18 2012, 10:27 AM

[Cosmin Lupu]

Hey Ty! I love the song it sounds awesome as an instrumental already, but nothing says you have to stop here Ivan's suggestions can offer interesting results for certain, so I think you should go for it. The songs seems as it is Tesseractish or Periphery'ish inspired, that meaning the possible vocal lines are not the repetitive and standard ones. Are you writing the vocal lines yourself, or is someone else taking care of this matter?

[Daniel Realpe]

I like the pattern you start with, makes a lot of sense to me, I guess because we have similar influences

I would add a extra strong melody to it so that it really becomes like a vocal line that the listener can follow,

I would actually put it where the first tapping occurs,

and make sure you repeat it,

The parts sound great individually, but make sure you find that continuity throughout, too many materials in the same piece can get the listener to stray his attention away.

You can add new material when it's justified, and that means, it has been presented before in a different way, or as a variation,

Listen carefully to the greats and you'll see they are doing this ALL THE TIME! even the guys who sound really complex and innovative,

I really like the ideas, but I would round them up even nicer, maybe you can make two songs out of this one,

This post has been edited by Daniel Realpe: Jan 18 2012, 04:16 PM

[Gabriel Leopardi]

hey!! this is really great stuff!! I loved the introduction... those delay clean ideas are brilliant!! the riffing sections are really cool but maybe after some parts it starts becoming a bit monotone... the tune is really good but if you want just a comment, maybe you could choose the most interesting parts from the riffing section and delete or work on the others.... keep on working on your material mate, this is very promising!

[Alex Feather]

Sounds great!!! I would start drums earlier at 0:13
I like tapping solo it's sounds really cool but it's missing vocals or a solo part
I love the chord changes and the groove you have created!!!!
Great job!!

[SirJamsalot]

I concur with the above. Lots of great ideas, but it's scattered theme-wise. I'd love to hear a solo theme that kicks in over the top of the opening riff(s) when the ball start rolling - something I can latch onto - doesn't have to be repetitive per se, but some sort of theme. That way any interlude in the middle will be a rest-stop for the mind before you hit second gear.

Liking your tones too. Not a fan of the drums but I'm guessing those are just a place holder til you get your song composed. Great work!

[TylerT]

WOW GUYS!! Thanks so much... I should be using GMC a lot more for help with stuff like this!!!

So many ideas, I can't use them all! But im going to try a lot of them out and see what I can come up with, then I will re-post!

[Todd Simpson]

Great work so far! Just about every angle has been covered and there are some great suggestions. I agree with everyone that there should be a melody through line, whether it's guitar lead line or vocal line. This is the heart of any great song that pulls the listener from start to finish. Without that, a composition comes off more or less as a backing track. You can use dissonance as well for the through line, but if it clashes badly with existing melody it can be harsh.

Getting in to the meat of things not too far after the start is always a good idea as folks generally need very little intro / atmosphere to prep them for the tune.

I get scooping the mids out to go for a heavy sound, but be careful there as pulling to much out kills the body of the guitar sound. I'm all about guitars having boom and bite, but some mid punch is always good I know this is still at the demo stage, so make sure to "jeep test" it on as many systems as possible during final mix.

Once you get near your final mix, if you could punch up the drums via sample replacement or sending them to a separate buss for processing to add some special sauce fx wise, that seldom hurts.

But seriously rocking riffs here man and very well played and recorded. In short it RAWKS!

[Cosmin Lupu]

Keep us updated Ty! I am a fan!

[Gabriel Leopardi]

WOW GUYS!! Thanks so much... I should be using GMC a lot more for help with stuff like this!!!

So many ideas, I can't use them all! But im going to try a lot of them out and see what I can come up with, then I will re-post!

Cool mate! I hope to hear the new version of this one and other new songs soon!