This is a Post Black Metal Band I created named Severn. I just finished the first demo that I plan on debuting in an EP named "The White River". I have no idea when I will finish, but when I do, I will make it free to download. Can you guys please rate and criticise this piece for me? I know the sweeping needs to be cleaned up a little bit, and I am working on that as best as possible.

Thank you!

Ok, if it were me I would probably either shorten the overall piece or introduce some variation on the main chord progression to make it more of a 'scene setter' and avoid it sounding like a recording of you just jamming over some chords.

I'm not sure about the sweeps personally. I probably wouldn't do them at all because it could come across as a bit contrived and exercise-y, but I could be wrong. If you're convinced then perhaps introduce harmonised sweeps on the second run through to add variation.

I like the tone you've chosen on the lead part. It works well.. just try and be more brutally decisive on choosing strong target notes to end your phrases on and stick to them.

I'm interested in how you chose the name Severn ? I assume you didn't name it after the River Severn which seperates England and Wales ??

This post has been edited by Ben Higgins: Dec 2 2011, 12:18 PM

Thank you for the advice! In fact, I noticed that there was a River Severn in England/Wales as well as another River Severn by my home in Niagara Falls. There is actually quite a large area in Ontario where it seems like everything has the name Severn. It is a pretty place during the winter time, I have yet to see it in any other season, so I chose that as a name.

Very nicely done! I think it has a good atmosphere. Regarding the arpeggios, they sound a bit repetitive, you could lower down the guitar in that part, or shorten the arps by halfs, it sounds like an exercise more then a song. Try adding simple kick+snare with reverb, it will sound great.

Unfortunately, I know absolutely nothing about playing the drums. So that is out

Thanks for the tip, though!

This post has been edited by Nihilist1: Dec 3 2011, 01:21 AM

Ivan was just suggesting adding some drums I think? Not actually playing them The good news is that it's really easy to do. EZ DRUMMER or my new fav BFD ECO will let you have a virtual session drummer with his own drums at your fingertips. Most of us here that do home recording use software drums. ECO is running about 30 euro last I checked so it's crazy cheap just now.

Most of us are not drummers, but learning to add drums to your creations is just another rung on the ladder musicianship. Spiff plugins like EZ and ECO make it a pretty quick step which is nice.