Public Opinions, In Which we discuss how we think others perceive us. Options

[klasaine]

One doesn't have to be 'outrageous' to be a con artist or in a musicians case - a performer. It will of course depend on the style and situation that you work within. Rammstein - yeah, over the top theater. Michael Buble is doing Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin - cool, reserved and confident. Two extremes but I'm sure neither are like that when they're out to dinner with their family on a thursday night.

Sure, honesty - but usually a M A G N I F I E D version of honesty. The performer has to believe it if he or she expects the audience to believe it.

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This post has been edited by klasaine: Jan 1 2014, 08:55 PM

[Cosmin Lupu]

Sure, honesty - but usually a M A G N I F I E D version of honesty. The performer has to believe it if he or she expects the audience to believe it.

This is a very good description of the whole thing After some years of lacking confidence in what I was doing onstage, I realized that people were actually receiving this feeling as well, so my luck was that I entered a very dynamic and stage show oriented band which literally took Cosmin out of the comfort zone and into the headbanging and jumping and crazy stage monkey zone!Never felt happier that actually happened!

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[Todd Simpson]

I think what you may be asking about is partly, learning to be a sociable guy People might find folks aloof if they take a bit longer than normal to engage in some small talk. I'm not a huge fan of small talk, but simply asking a question or two about whoever your talking to works wonders as has been mentioned Also, something I had to force myself to do is keep track of what my face is doing . Sometimes I'll be thinking of something else while carrying on a conversation and make and odd face. Almost had to train myself to keep smiling at least somewhat when conversing face to face with folks. Even the pace of a conversation can throw some folks off. If you take too long to respond for example. Most conversations have a rythm that most people sync to without realizing. My timing in conversation is terrible. So I try to let whoever I'm talking to set the pace then match it as we go. You'd think these things would be natural and easy but for me they were a bunch of work Guitar was much easier.

Todd

These are some very good observations! People tell me that at first I can seem aloof, but that quickly changes when I decide what to say. I think it is very important to choose your words wisely whenever you speak, and always remain thoughtful. The single-mindedness required to succeed in something like music needs a little introversion to some degree I'm sure. It's listening to that same inner voice that I make music with that helps me convey my ambitions and intentions, as well as the esteem I regard everyone I meet with.

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[Cosmin Lupu]

I think what you may be asking about is partly, learning to be a sociable guy People might find folks aloof if they take a bit longer than normal to engage in some small talk. I'm not a huge fan of small talk, but simply asking a question or two about whoever your talking to works wonders as has been mentioned Also, something I had to force myself to do is keep track of what my face is doing . Sometimes I'll be thinking of something else while carrying on a conversation and make and odd face. Almost had to train myself to keep smiling at least somewhat when conversing face to face with folks. Even the pace of a conversation can throw some folks off. If you take too long to respond for example. Most conversations have a rythm that most people sync to without realizing. My timing in conversation is terrible. So I try to let whoever I'm talking to set the pace then match it as we go. You'd think these things would be natural and easy but for me they were a bunch of work Guitar was much easier.

Todd

For me it's quite the opposite - a conversation, is a journey filled with splendid and interesting human landscapes. I am always there all the time and I like taking people on my train sometimes as much as spending time in theirs.. I am fascinated with how much we can learn from one another and how much we discover about ourselves by speaking to other people. Just like guitar playing and everything else - it's a matter of focus and letting things flow.

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[Todd Simpson]

Well said!!! Good conversation really is like a good jam session. About "being there" fully and letting it flow. Too often I find myself distracted by my own thoughts in the middle of a conversation, and sometimes even in the middle of a solo. Being a bit too ADHD has it's drawbacks. Music is something that can help us learn focus and I never thought about it, but conversation can help us learn it as well.

Todd

For me it's quite the opposite - a conversation, is a journey filled with splendid and interesting human landscapes. I am always there all the time and I like taking people on my train sometimes as much as spending time in theirs.. I am fascinated with how much we can learn from one another and how much we discover about ourselves by speaking to other people. Just like guitar playing and everything else - it's a matter of focus and letting things flow.

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[klasaine]

I was once asked, "are you the type of person that listens or do you just wait to talk?"
This applies to music as well as conversation.

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This post has been edited by klasaine: Jan 6 2014, 12:04 AM

[Cosmin Lupu]

I was once asked, "are you the type of person that listens or do you just wait to talk?"
This applies to music as well as conversation.

Very good observation here Ken Music should be a conversation, especially when it comes down to playing with other people and involving spontaneous 'answering'.. that's when you can't just wait to talk. You have to listen in order to give the right answer I do believe that you are well versed in the art of improvisation - have you dealt with people who were just waiting for their tun to talk?

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[klasaine]

I do believe that you are well versed in the art of improvisation - have you dealt with people who were just waiting for their tun to talk?

Yeah, there's a lot of that unfortunately. I try not to have to 'deal' with those folks too often. When I do, I don't say too much.

Have you ever wondered why a particular guitar player (or any musician in general) who really doesn't play too much or isn't very flashy or doesn't just play burning solos all the time got that really good gig with whomever - pick your superstar?
99.9 % of the time it has more to do with what they don't play (as well as what they literally don't say).

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This post has been edited by klasaine: Jan 6 2014, 10:36 AM

[Cosmin Lupu]

Yeah, there's a lot of that unfortunately. I try not to have to 'deal' with those folks too often. When I do, I don't say too much.

Have you ever wondered why a particular guitar player (or any musician in general) who really doesn't play too much or isn't very flashy or doesn't just play burning solos all the time got that really good gig with whomever - pick your superstar?
99.9 % of the time it has more to do with what they don't play (as well as what they literally don't say).

What was your nicest, most fulfilling experience in respect to improvising with other folks, if I may ask, of course

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[klasaine]

I'm pretty lucky in that I have a lot of colleagues that are outstanding improvisors and in general very sensitive to what's going on around them. Thankfully there have been numerous fulfilling experiences improvising.

The two songs in my signature are great examples - other than the melody, nothing was 'worked out' ahead of time. The antithesis of gigs that employ a lot of improv is to have to tell people what to play.

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This post has been edited by klasaine: Jan 6 2014, 06:08 PM

[Cosmin Lupu]

I'm pretty lucky in that I have a lot of colleagues that are outstanding improvisors and in general very sensitive to what's going on around them. Thankfully there have been numerous fulfilling experiences improvising.

The two songs in my signature are great examples - other than the melody, nothing was 'worked out' ahead of time. The antithesis of gigs that employ a lot of improv is to have to tell people what to play.

Oh wow I had no clue those were improvisations. Great to hear Ken - I asked, because you seem like the kind of player that has a lot to do with this world in real live situations, with people.

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[tonyk]

All these tales of positive responses from interacting with people almost makes me want to leave the bedroom and meet people

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[Cosmin Lupu]

All these tales of positive responses from interacting with people almost makes me want to leave the bedroom and meet people

True evolution occurs when you are meeting people and applying what you have been studying. You can't succeed without any of the two. And when I mean succeed, I mean having a balanced life. In music, true inspiration comes after various interactions with our kin or with nature - both being outside, so Tony, yes, go out there and meet as many people as you can

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[klasaine]

Oh wow I had no clue those were improvisations. Great to hear Ken - I asked, because you seem like the kind of player that has a lot to do with this world in real live situations, with people.

Only the 'jam' part. The melodies and chord changes are the known quantity. But as to the feel, how long the solos will last, dynamics, chord voicings, bass lines, when the melody comes back in - that's all left up to the player and the moment.

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This post has been edited by klasaine: Jan 7 2014, 05:33 PM