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GMC Forum _ CHILL OUT _ problems with student´s parents
Posted by: Osedmen Dec 23 2014, 01:33 AM
Hi Gmc.
Sometimes when i teach guitar classes parents ask me..... teacher! how was my kid? how much time my child could be play the guitar well?
or...... i spend lot of money but my child don´t play any thing?
what do you think?
is problem for the teacher? or for the student? or for the parents maybe?
i have lot of children who are very discipline and is cool to work with them.....
but i really bothers me when parents want fast results and sometimes are ofensive !
have you ever been in a similar situation? how to manage this?
in my case i ask .....
your child practice at least 30 minutes per day?
ok.... maybe you can give more advises to parents understand !
thanks a lot 
Posted by: JamesT Dec 23 2014, 03:58 AM
The teacher can play a role in helping parents understand the factors that contribute to how a typical student might progress. As we all are aware, how good we get at guitar depends on many things. Probably foremost in everyone's knowledge is that how good you are does not depend on how many years one has been playing but more importantly on how many hours. And since hours we spend at the instrument will depend on our own personal motivation, then personal motivation plays a huge role as well in how quickly we progress. To me, these are the two most important things: hours on instrument, and personal motivation. Once we have considered these two factors, we can then begin to look at our exposure to musical theory, the techniques to focus on, and sources of inspiration (the music we hear and listen to). A good instructor can illuminate the importance of these topics as well as explain them and help the student to understand their application. Beyond that, it definitely is up to the student to embrace the knowledge shared by the instructor and apply as much as possible while focusing on those things the instructor believes are important and at the appropriate level for the student.
Parents have the responsibility to know their child well enough to understand the child's level of interest for playing music. Parents should be aware of the amount of effort that their child is putting in. Finally, parents should encourage their children to have fun while doing their best and that is all that should be expected. I believe it is rare that a student demonstrate "innate talent" or "natural ability". If a parent sees this in their child, then the parent should offer support to the extent of the desires of the child but not beyond.
... just my 2c. as I've been there before.
Posted by: fkalich Dec 23 2014, 04:56 AM
You can take a horse to water, but you can't make them drink.
I know myself that with concentration my learning curve can be 10 times as flattened as it is without concentration. You might get an adult to concentrate, maybe. But with a kid it might be impossible. Especially today, with so many distractions available.
Regarding the parents, I know that is difficult. No way out of that one. It sounds to me like you are basically dealing with people who don't really see things in a reasonable way. Maybe just don't say too much. In such situations you probably can't help yourself much with a lot of discussion. Do your best and take their money if they want to continue.
Posted by: Mertay Dec 23 2014, 03:21 PM
You have to educate the parents too
Kids are usually involved with knowledge when learning things, like math or science etc...
Guitar on the other hand is like sports, knowledge isn't enough and asking for fast results is like wanting them to play on NBA as soon as then can bounce a ball 
Posted by: Spock Dec 24 2014, 09:17 AM
The parents are expecting instant gratification, like the children are - which is why most people don't stick with an instrument. It takes time, even though I firmly understand that the skill will come quicker to some people than to others as they are just wired that way from birth,
But in these situations you speak of, the most logical and fulfilling way to handle one of these impatient parents is to simply beat their ass.
Posted by: PosterBoy Dec 24 2014, 10:36 AM
Parents are often a problem as they think they've handed the whole responsibility of their child's learning onto someone else and that they play no part in it.
Posted by: Darius Wave Dec 25 2014, 03:55 PM
Happens all the time. Some kids need more time to get things done, some other less. Unfortunately there is a 3rd group of those who" can but.. don't do". Most common problem I experience i rather how parents understand what means "my kid can play". Some parents just want to hear the beatles covers etc...anything else is just a "cat music". So it's not important that their kid breaks 3/4 of Dream Theatre solos...it's importnant the kid won't play "happy birthday" on the family meeting
At the moment I have one girl to pass out. I have to tell her parents that going on the lesson once per 3 weeks won't bring her anything...at least not when I know she doesn't do a lot by herself at home. Also...If You really want to play an instrument there is no place fro situations like "Excuse me I had no time to play guitar this week because I had and exams..." You know...not a period exam...just a regular test done weekly at school. I do not believe it's hard to find 30 minutes per day when You're at school. Everybody have a duties. You can spent less time thatn usually but playing guitar is not something You can leave for a week or two and still hope You'll make prgoress with such an attitude. That's something some parents do not understand as well.
Posted by: klasaine Dec 25 2014, 05:16 PM
Ah, the bane of 'private' music instruction ... which is why I quit doing it years ago.
Posted by: Osedmen Dec 25 2014, 06:15 PM
Parents have the responsibility to know their child well enough to understand the child's level of interest for playing music. Parents should be aware of the amount of effort that their child is putting in. Finally, parents should encourage their children to have fun while doing their best and that is all that should be expected. I believe it is rare that a student demonstrate "innate talent" or "natural ability". If a parent sees this in their child, then the parent should offer support to the extent of the desires of the child but not beyond.
... just my 2c. as I've been there before.
Yeah James i totally agree with you, 2 aspects are interesting
lol yeah sometimes happens
At the moment I have one girl to pass out. I have to tell her parents that going on the lesson once per 3 weeks won't bring her anything...at least not when I know she doesn't do a lot by herself at home. Also...If You really want to play an instrument there is no place fro situations like "Excuse me I had no time to play guitar this week because I had and exams..." You know...not a period exam...just a regular test done weekly at school. I do not believe it's hard to find 30 minutes per day when You're at school. Everybody have a duties. You can spent less time thatn usually but playing guitar is not something You can leave for a week or two and still hope You'll make prgoress with such an attitude. That's something some parents do not understand as well.
excellent opinion
But in these situations you speak of, the most logical and fulfilling way to handle one of these impatient parents is to simply beat their ass.
lol yeah sometimes i want to do it.
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