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Posted by: Eat-Sleep-andJam Aug 21 2008, 02:25 AM

Verse 1: (Male)

Patience only goes so far,
Until others make your blood run thin.
She must find what she is looking for,
Until the world comes crashing back onto her.

Sense when did that pressure, cave in on us.
We tried so hard, until we finally lost.
And when we wrote it down,
Our words were nowhere to be found
So we asked ourself "Where did we go wrong" ?


Chorus:(Male) I helped you stand your ground,
Picked up you from the lost and found.
But when you gave up on me,
I saw who you truly are.
Selfishness only goes so far.


Verse2: (Male) So after all those drugs and late night crowds.
My love for you doesnt still beat loud ?
I guess even a helping hand can be pushed away.
Maybe I will come back another day.

Did you see the world fall back down on you?
I guess noone knows what youve been through.
So lets act this never happened.
And move on.


Chorus:(Male) I helped you stand your ground,
Picked up you from the lost and found.
But when you gave up on me,
I saw who you truly are.
Selfishness only goes so far.

Verse 3: Female sings from here perspective

After all your knocks to the ground,
I was shocked when you came around.
Looking for me, as I was once looking for you.

Wasnt this our love in the making ?
Or was it my heart, that was yours for the taking.
And after all you did to me ?
I dont want you anymore

Is it so hard to see ?


Chorus:(Both Sing) I helped you stand your ground,
Picked up you from the lost and found.
But when you gave up on me,
I saw who you truly are.
Selfishness only goes so far.

Outro Verse ( Male): I'll remember this day,
The day you pushed my love away.
This pain will be forever known.
Our love,



Is a Warzone.


© John Minoia 2008

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is about a relationship. I tried to capture the ups and downs of both sides and struggles by having both a Male and Female vocal present in the song. Tell me what you think

Constructed Criticism is Welcomed !

/J

Posted by: The Uncreator Aug 28 2008, 12:54 AM

This one is pretty cool, I love how you use male and female to sing there perspectives, I love doin' that myself . I don't know how much the female voice is singing in the song exactly, But it seems like she should have a few more parts, thats about it. Otherwise, cool stuff

Posted by: sigma7 Aug 28 2008, 12:58 AM

wow, dude ur wicked good, maybe u should become student instructor on poetry because i could use a few lessons from u, i have ideas but i dont know howe to write them. Very nice job, haha please teach now tho haha

Posted by: Eat-Sleep-andJam Aug 28 2008, 04:44 PM

Yeah I can relate to exactly what you mean, I appreciate the criticism ! I guess the reason I did that is because It was the male that was hurt in the end, So I felt as if he was the one left with a broken heart, and as for the Female, she only had to say a little bit to get her point across. That point being " Im leaving."



Thanks Man I appreciate it !

If you have Aim or Msn I could talk with you about it !