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> Domestic Violence, :(
javari
post Feb 1 2009, 09:43 PM
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QUOTE (Kristofer Dahl @ Feb 1 2009, 09:38 PM) *
Because of the sensitive nature of this topic as well as our forum guidelines I would like to ask Jesse and Javari to post in English so that moderators can understand your posts, thanks!


just because it is sensitive I choose to reply in his own language.
I guess you have to trust us on this one...


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sted
post Feb 1 2009, 09:54 PM
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Get help man, if not for your sake then your brothers, if you are cut up he must be going through hell. In UK we have a "child line" which kids can call in absolute confidence, the link below sounds like something similar for your country.

http://www.ombudsnet.org/Organisations/vie...&fromEnoc=y

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Rated Htr
post Feb 1 2009, 09:55 PM
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Said it on msn bro...

Hope you get over the situation


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enforcer
post Feb 1 2009, 10:43 PM
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Does your father drink? Does he do all this things in the influence of alchool?


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it, surely, spoiled me!!!


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Ajmurrell
post Feb 2 2009, 01:10 AM
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My personal advice is to get some professional advice. I'm not trying to say that following peoples advice here would be a bad idea, its just that with something this serious, you don't want to put yourself in harms way.

Do you have a confidential phone advice line in Holland? Or something like a Citizens Advice Bereau?

Don't want to step on anyones shoes here, I just think before following anyones advice, you should regonise none of us can give a professional opinion on this matter.

I am sorry to hear about it though, and wish you all the best. Do keep in touch and let us know you're ok.

This post has been edited by Ajmurrell: Feb 2 2009, 01:11 AM


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fatb0t
post Feb 2 2009, 05:11 AM
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I'm sorry to hear this George... I had a friend once who had the same issue. His father was a military man and he thought it was normal to hit his kids and his wife...
My friend moved out when he was 18, it helped his situation - I don't know about his mom and his sister. I would advise you to tell your school psychologist if you have one.
You're dealing with a very difficult situation and there isn't much we can do from the confines of the internet. Your best bet really is professional help.
I hope everything works out..
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SonofDestiny
post Feb 2 2009, 09:16 PM
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QUOTE (enforcer @ Feb 1 2009, 10:43 PM) *
Does your father drink? Does he do all this things in the influence of alchool?


Nope, he doesn't at all. I think he's been raised the same way as he's trying to raise us. My grandma is pretty cruel and my dad is her puppet. Whatever she says he will do. It's so stupid. We got him to a good point once, but then she told him not to be like that and he went mental again.

The weird thing that when he's not having his aggressive moods he is a nice guy. To the outside world he is always smiling and greeting everyone. Problem is that it's pretty fake. I talked to my best friend (well, nowadays ex-best friend) about this matter and he wouldn't believe me. Just acted like a proper smartass about it. That's why I just let this be..

My parents both have been in therapy already. So has my brother. That didn't work...

It's so weird. Right now I feel like a betrayer thinking of this stuff and talking about it. No fights today though.. thank god.


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enforcer
post Feb 2 2009, 09:42 PM
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Man, if it is not alchool doing this to him and he is faking to outside that he is like a good man that is a serious problem. You cant just leave your mom and your brother like that. Things may look grim, but dont let this cloud your judgement. Things cant be worse than this. There is a notion in psychology called "Conditionned desperation" You might experience this.Things are bad, and you cant break this cycle in with the fear of getting things worse. But I believe they cant be any worse. You should talk to a neighboor about this, and let him/her talk to your mom, and make her justify your point. And let others call the police or social services. You cant let this continue like this. My mother is a family legal consultant and a lawyer specialised in family issues so I just asked her about this situation. Your family needs external legal intervention.

I hope you can get this right.





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incoming spoiler read it at your own risk!


Spoiler:


Vigier G.V Wood HH
American Stratocaster Maple Standart with X2N bridge pickups
Samwick Artist custom modified Baswood Lespaul with S.Duncan JB and N56 pickups
Self made Fretless Strat type made of Rosewood/Maple with self wound Neck and Ibanez V8 Bridge Pickups
Floor Pod 2.0 Amp Simulation System
Pod Xt Pro Rack Amp Simulation System
Digitech TSR 12 Rack Effect and Studio Reverb
Behringer Composer Rack Compressor Expander
Morley Bad Horsie Wah Pedal
Behringer FB1010 Floor Board



it, surely, spoiled me!!!


and may the force be with you :)
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Trond Vold
post Feb 3 2009, 12:00 AM
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Ohman sad.gif Thats a bad situation you got going on there.
Like the rest, i'm no professional and i'm not really sure how to advice on something like this.

But do you know if your brothers school-teachers have noticed something going on with him? Or knows that he's being beaten at home?
If they sense something is wrong, then they have a responsability to report it to the authorities.

Maybe something can be worked on from that angle? And this way you dont have to be the one taking that hard step to call it in yourself.


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opeth.db
post Feb 3 2009, 12:27 AM
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Not a professional here but you owe it to your brother and your mother to do something and not sit on the side lines.

To many times people wait, wait, and wait only to find out the worst circumstances only to come true and your in denial the rest of your life asking yourself what you should have done.

My prayers are with you and your family.


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MickeM
post Feb 3 2009, 03:50 PM
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Like many said, we're not professionals. We can't really present a solution that will hold water, infact, suggestions could though they sound good in theory make things worse. And we don't want to do that.

I hope there's a solution somehere for you and your brother to this problem. You're still young and shouldn't have to deal with this kind of problem, it's very unfair that you find yourself in that situation. So keep in mind there are people who do this for a living that could help.

I'm closing the thread now because of the sensitivity of the matter together with the fact that we're not really competent on the subject. We don't want to risk making things worse.

I think it's safe to say though that we all wish the best for you and your family.


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