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> My Human Darkness
The Uncreator
post Jul 3 2009, 04:40 PM
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_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

My Human Darkness
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

There is no one watching over us
There is no one answering your pleas
We are alone in a world full of sin
On our own in a world full of deception

We can walk wherever the wind takes us
Or we can follow the path set ahead
But nothing we do will ever bear weight
We are nothingness
In a void of insignificance

Aborted from the original design
Abstracted out of a known reality
A ghost like planet following the path
Orbiting an empty sun in an empty universe

We can walk wherever we please
We can do what we like
But don't dare think of faith
Don't you dare believe

For this is no redemption
This is no salvation

Our tainted souls wipe the slate clean

Don't you dare think of faith
Don't even try to believe
In anything or anyone
Your not meant for them
Your not meant for this
Just lay down and die
Don't even consider loyalty
Don't even bother to breathe
Do us all a favor and crush your heart
Till it no longer beats

You can feel empty
You can feel sorrow
You can feel love
You can feel elation

I can't a feel anything
I don't feel anymore
My sins are too great
To beget me redemption

Don't you dare think of faith
Don't even try to believe
In anything or anyone
Your not meant for them
Your not meant for this
Just lay down and die
Don't even consider loyalty
Don't even bother to breathe
Do us all a favor and crush your heart
Till it no longer beats

But what if my sins are my only strength?
What if salvation can be found in depression?
My own self-loathing must come to an end
I no longer forsake what I was, am, or will be

My redemption has long since left me to die
But my darkness still bears some kind of light
Even if I am still damned to be some worthless soul
I refuse to drown the breaths of those
Who still know how to believe

Don't you dare think of faith
Don't even try to believe
Before you know why you should
Your not meant for this world
Your not meant for this time
Just lay down and...
Don't even consider loyalty
Don't even bother to breathe
Till you know why the human heart
Even in death continues to believe






© Brett Windnagle, 2008


_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


This one is quite hard to explain, But at the same time it isn't. I'll let you deduce what you can from the words.
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Santiago Diaz Ga...
post Jul 4 2009, 03:17 AM
Post #2


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It has the Pain Of Salvation style of lyric!. Very nice man, I liked it a lot


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Eat-Sleep-andJam
post Jul 7 2009, 04:59 PM
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QUOTE (The Uncreator @ Jul 3 2009, 08:40 AM) *
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _

My Human Darkness
_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _
I would like to first say that I like the title of the piece. Very Cool.


There is no one watching over us
There is no one answering your pleas
We are alone in a world full of sin
On our own in a world full of deception
Nice way to start. Everything connects pretty well.

We can walk wherever the wind takes us
Or we can follow the path set ahead
But nothing we do will ever bear weight
We are nothingness
In a void of insignificance
I like this verse. But I dont like the last two ending words for the last to lines. The point of being insignificant is already pretty much established Imo when you say nothingness. So that is one thing I would pick on .

Aborted from the original design
Abstracted out of a known reality
A ghost like planet following the path
Orbiting an empty sun in an empty universe
You really do always come through when your talking about space. This is no exception. Nice verse.

We can walk wherever we please
We can do what we like
But don't dare think of faith
Don't you dare believe

It took me a second to think about it, but I guess this does connect with the space reference.
For this is no redemption
This is no salvation

By this point im pretty much certain that these would fit perfect in like a very hard death metal song. biggrin.gif

Our tainted souls wipe the slate clean

Don't you dare think of faith
Don't even try to believe
In anything or anyone
Your not meant for them
Your not meant for this
Just lay down and die
Don't even consider loyalty
Don't even bother to breathe
Do us all a favor and crush your heart
Till it no longer beats
I like how you didnt say dare to believe for the second. That little variation keeps the reader on his or her toes. After reading the whole verse. This kinda through me a curveball. I now appreciate the title more, if you know what i mean.

You can feel empty
You can feel sorrow
You can feel love
You can feel elation

I can't a feel anything
I don't feel anymore
My sins are too great
To beget me redemption

Don't you dare think of faith
Don't even try to believe
In anything or anyone
Your not meant for them
Your not meant for this
Just lay down and die
Don't even consider loyalty
Don't even bother to breathe
Do us all a favor and crush your heart
Till it no longer beats

But what if my sins are my only strength?
What if salvation can be found in depression?
My own self-loathing must come to an end
I no longer forsake what I was, am, or will be

Finally. You make sense out of all the dark thoughts. Wasn't expecting this to go in this direction but it is nice.
My redemption has long since left me to die
But my darkness still bears some kind of light
Even if I am still damned to be some worthless soul
I refuse to drown the breaths of those
Who still know how to believe

This is my favorite verse thus far ^ !!!!

Don't you dare think of faith
Don't even try to believe
Before you know why you should
Your not meant for this world
Your not meant for this time
Just lay down and...
Don't even consider loyalty
Don't even bother to breathe
Till you know why the human heart
Even in death continues to believe

Nice to see an end to such a dark but well put together piece. It had alot of power, and the struggle that you were trying to interpret in it( if that is what you were trying to show at all) definitely shines through. Amongst all of your Human Darkness cool.gif






© Brett Windnagle, 2008


_ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _


This one is quite hard to explain, But at the same time it isn't. I'll let you deduce what you can from the words.



--------------------
Join Me On the Lyrics Board !


"Find something worth dying for...



...And live for it"
-The Uncreator
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The Uncreator
post Jul 8 2009, 02:56 AM
Post #4


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Its inspired by the main character in Clive Barker's book "Imajica"...Who trust me has some problems laugh.gif

But in the end he does a great and amazing thing smile.gif
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