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> Help! My Lp Smells Like A Woman!
Crazy_Diamond
post Jan 19 2010, 08:11 PM
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Your guitar is new she wants to please you.... Don't worry in a few months she won't evenb shaved her legs anymore.


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Boson
post Jan 19 2010, 09:37 PM
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QUOTE (Staffy @ Jan 19 2010, 09:20 AM) *
So what shall I do? Any suggestions ???

//Staffay



Staffay I Tink you are going stir crazy.

You need to get out more smile.gif

In fact I woud go far as to say that the fact that you think that you think your guitar smells like a woman is a sure sign that you are having problems. The only known cure is complete withdrawal from the source of the problem, you need to send all your new gear to me biggrin.gif

This post has been edited by Boson: Jan 19 2010, 09:42 PM


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Staffy
post Jan 19 2010, 11:17 PM
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QUOTE (Fran @ Jan 19 2010, 08:07 PM) *
laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif

You guys are nuts laugh.gif

On topic: I wish my SG smell like perfume... it does smell like something ever since I bought it, but I believe it's lacquer, but it's not really pleasant... or unpleasant really... the case seems to be the source anyway. Maybe they pack them in their cases a bit too early before they actually dry 100% ?


Sure we are nuts! smile.gif Tell me one guitar player that's not???
I will agree to what You say, seriously, this is probably the case here, but the strange thing is that the guitar has resided on my wall for almost 2 months now and still smells..... Although I find it somehow a pleasant smell rather than disgusting... Maybe they put different smells in the laquer? Eg. if You buy a LP studio (which seems to be the cheapest), You get the smell of sleazy bar womens rest room, whilst buying a NOS, You will get a scent of Marilyn Monroe (or even better my personal favourite Michelle Pfeiffer, has to check this out)...
What do Ya think of that???

//Staffay

QUOTE (Crazy_Diamond @ Jan 19 2010, 08:11 PM) *
Your guitar is new she wants to please you.... Don't worry in a few months she won't evenb shaved her legs anymore.


Months? My ex. didn't shave her legs, neither her upper lips one week after we got engaged.... those women... laugh.gif

QUOTE (Boson @ Jan 19 2010, 09:37 PM) *
Staffay I Tink you are going stir crazy.

You need to get out more smile.gif

In fact I woud go far as to say that the fact that you think that you think your guitar smells like a woman is a sure sign that you are having problems. The only known cure is complete withdrawal from the source of the problem, you need to send all your new gear to me biggrin.gif


Go out more? Nah, then my guitars will never forgive me..... and send them to You doesn't seem as a solution since I already tattooed "Property of a Swedish Maniac with a russian hat" in their backs.... And since that desription doesn't fit on You, it will be bad idea... tongue.gif


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Boson
post Jan 20 2010, 12:33 AM
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QUOTE (Staffy @ Jan 19 2010, 11:17 PM) *
Go out more? Nah, then my guitars will never forgive me..... and send them to You doesn't seem as a solution since I already tattooed "Property of a Swedish Maniac with a russian hat" in their backs.... And since that desription doesn't fit on You, it will be bad idea... tongue.gif


Thats just it Staffy these girls are individual you cannot treat them like you own them.

Give them up! Overcome your possesive tendancies, send them to me!

You will feel so much better. cool.gif

If you are able to give up this obsessive, behaviour you have a chance of a normal (boring!!) life. dry.gif

Remember Michielle Pfiffer likes to be wooed and cajouled rather than doninated.

On the other hand you could just shred them within an inch of their lives and let them know who is boss. Make them quake at the sight of a russian hat! wink.gif

If all else fails and these smells still worry you then fight fire with fire and chasnge your aftershave! laugh.gif


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Staffy
post Jan 20 2010, 01:43 AM
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QUOTE (Boson @ Jan 20 2010, 12:33 AM) *
Thats just it Staffy these girls are individual you cannot treat them like you own them.

Give them up! Overcome your possesive tendancies, send them to me!

You will feel so much better. cool.gif

If you are able to give up this obsessive, behaviour you have a chance of a normal (boring!!) life. dry.gif

Remember Michielle Pfiffer likes to be wooed and cajouled rather than doninated.

On the other hand you could just shred them within an inch of their lives and let them know who is boss. Make them quake at the sight of a russian hat! wink.gif

If all else fails and these smells still worry you then fight fire with fire and chasnge your aftershave! laugh.gif


What? I DO own them for gods sake.... tongue.gif And I will NOT ever more have a boring life, I rather kill myself before that....
For Michelle I'm ready to do everything, even give You the guitars - do You got her number???? biggrin.gif
And for that aftershave.... I have'nt been using neither aftershave or any razors or even trimmers since June last year - so why shall I begin now ??? laugh.gif


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Praetorian
post Jan 20 2010, 02:53 AM
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QUOTE (Crazy_Diamond @ Jan 19 2010, 02:11 PM) *
Your guitar is new she wants to please you.... Don't worry in a few months she won't evenb shaved her legs anymore.


ohmy.gif huh.gif

Thank god I live in America! laugh.gif


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maharzan
post Jan 20 2010, 03:25 AM
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That definitely tells me that somebody has been messing around with your LP. biggrin.gif:D

BEWARE!!


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Hammerhead
post Jan 20 2010, 03:35 AM
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I don't even know what to say wacko.gif Yes we are all nuts! I think you can just giver your LP a girls name (Michelle maybe) and enjoy it. I don't however want to see you taking her out to dinner and the movies, and then home for a little huh.gif ... laugh.gif biggrin.gif laugh.gif NO NO NO!!!


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-Zion-
post Jan 20 2010, 12:53 PM
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When i first got my LP last year, it had this funny sweet smell.. when i opened the case for the very first time, i was overwhelmed by the smell of the guitar.. Actually to the point where it was waaaaay too much for me..

And for a month or two, every time i had played my LP my fingers would smell of this sweet smell as well.. It was so "bad" that i almost got really tired of the smell.

After practicing with my band (who are all smokers, btw), my sweet sweet LP now smells terribly of cigarettes, and i would give anything to have that "new" smell back again... I miss it now..

At the moment i am using Dean Markley Love Potion #9 to polish my guitar, and while the stench of cigarettes is gone, and my guitar smells really really great, it's not quite the same..

perhaps i should just get myself a new LP.. Never ever play it and just open the case once in a while to get that smell.. wink.gif
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peixe
post Jan 20 2010, 12:59 PM
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Haha this is so funny! smile.gif

Every now and then a thread really catches on... this should be one of the candidates to "Thread of the year 2010" haha biggrin.gif
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Staffy
post Jan 20 2010, 01:40 PM
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QUOTE (-Zion- @ Jan 20 2010, 12:53 PM) *
When i first got my LP last year, it had this funny sweet smell.. when i opened the case for the very first time, i was overwhelmed by the smell of the guitar.. Actually to the point where it was waaaaay too much for me..

And for a month or two, every time i had played my LP my fingers would smell of this sweet smell as well.. It was so "bad" that i almost got really tired of the smell.

After practicing with my band (who are all smokers, btw), my sweet sweet LP now smells terribly of cigarettes, and i would give anything to have that "new" smell back again... I miss it now..

At the moment i am using Dean Markley Love Potion #9 to polish my guitar, and while the stench of cigarettes is gone, and my guitar smells really really great, it's not quite the same..

perhaps i should just get myself a new LP.. Never ever play it and just open the case once in a while to get that smell.. ;)


Aaaah!! Spot on! Finally someone who knows what I'm talkin bout here! But we are MEN (xcuse me again rokchik) for gods sake, our guitars can't smell like women, maybe I shall try to polish mine with my underwear??? laugh.gif


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jstcrsn
post Jan 20 2010, 01:54 PM
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my guitat just smells like me sucking ohmy.gif
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Praetorian
post Jan 20 2010, 02:13 PM
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QUOTE (jstcrsn @ Jan 20 2010, 07:54 AM) *
my guitat just smells like me sucking ohmy.gif


laugh.gif

I am afraid both my guitars give off the same stench!


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-Zion-
post Jan 20 2010, 02:55 PM
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QUOTE (Staffy @ Jan 20 2010, 01:40 PM) *
Aaaah!! Spot on! Finally someone who knows what I'm talkin bout here! But we are MEN (xcuse me again rokchik) for gods sake, our guitars can't smell like women, maybe I shall try to polish mine with my underwear??? laugh.gif

laugh.gif
Ya, i get where you are coming from, and although i agree with you (to a certain degree), i dont want my guitar to smell the way that a small room filled with guys smells like after a week of partying.. wink.gif
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Ivan Milenkovic
post Jan 20 2010, 03:31 PM
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naah, probably some lady in Gibson factory did a setup/testing on the guitar, so the perfume stuck from there biggrin.gif


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Staffy
post Jan 20 2010, 04:10 PM
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QUOTE (Ivan Milenkovic @ Jan 20 2010, 03:31 PM) *
naah, probably some lady in Gibson factory did a setup/testing on the guitar, so the perfume stuck from there biggrin.gif


Hmmm, You may be right here Ivan. That also explains why their 50-year-NOS-expensive-as-a-new-car LP DOES'NT smell like that.(I was into the store smelling it the other day, just to be sure)
Probably the same lady tests the guitar as in the 50's, just as Fender has the same lady who wires the pick-ups on their NOS-pieces'o'junk. And thats a good thing regarding the employment of older people, so I decided to write Gibson a letter:

"Dear Gibson
My new Les Paul doesn't smell right, so I will appreciate if You can employ my former mother-in-law, so the next guitar I buy from You will have a more vintage touch. Also it may help me to get me interested in women again, since everytime I see her, I'm loosing the appetite for women and it always takes years to recover. In return I can smell-test every LP that comes into my sight so You may now which serials You have to get back to the factory.

Best Regards
A partly disappointed customer"

Btw. Here is how she looks:
(it really is THE picture that motivates me to play guitar instead of messing around with women.......)

//Staffay

This post has been edited by Staffy: Jan 20 2010, 04:12 PM
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Crazy_Diamond
post Jan 20 2010, 04:43 PM
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QUOTE (Staffy @ Jan 20 2010, 07:40 AM) *
Aaaah!! Spot on! Finally someone who knows what I'm talkin bout here! But we are MEN (xcuse me again rokchik) for gods sake, our guitars can't smell like women, maybe I shall try to polish mine with my underwear??? laugh.gif


With the kind of relation I have with my guitar I still prefer her to smell like a woman then to smell like a man. Don't you find there se something sensual about playing ? I prefer having a sensual relation with something that is more apparent to be a woman biggrin.gif

Edit: And as for the picture I understand why you like guitar better then woman, but don't you know plenty of nicer woman thant that ???

This post has been edited by Crazy_Diamond: Jan 20 2010, 04:45 PM


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Staffy
post Jan 20 2010, 04:50 PM
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QUOTE (Crazy_Diamond @ Jan 20 2010, 04:43 PM) *
With the kind of relation I have with my guitar I still prefer her to smell like a woman then to smell like a man. Don't you find there se something sensual about playing ? I prefer having a sensual relation with something that is more apparent to be a woman biggrin.gif

Edit: And as for the picture I understand why you like guitar better then woman, but don't you know plenty of nicer woman thant that ???


Hmmm, thats true! But lets say that I would feel better with a guitar some more neutral-smelling.
Yeah, I do know a lot of good-looking women, but every time I get tempted to make a move on some of them, this picture are in front of my eyes.... thats really why I want Gibson to hire her, so that spell goes away! tongue.gif


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Fran
post Jan 20 2010, 08:47 PM
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QUOTE (Staffy @ Jan 19 2010, 11:17 PM) *
....Maybe they put different smells in the laquer? Eg. if You buy a LP studio (which seems to be the cheapest), You get the smell of sleazy bar womens rest room, whilst buying a NOS, You will get a scent of Marilyn Monroe (or even better my personal favourite Michelle Pfeiffer, has to check this out)...
What do Ya think of that???

//Staffay


laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif

I knew I had to get an SG custom... but I'm cheap laugh.gif


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Staffy
post Jan 20 2010, 11:13 PM
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QUOTE (Fran @ Jan 20 2010, 08:47 PM) *
laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif

I knew I had to get an SG custom... but I'm cheap laugh.gif


So what smell gonna that one have? The smell of Sarah (Michelle) Gellar ??? laugh.gif
(Michelle´nust be "the custom" in it...)

//Staffay


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