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> Encouragement Or Not, WHat do you think?
Todd Simpson
post Nov 20 2011, 11:26 PM
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QUOTE (Ben Higgins @ Nov 20 2011, 06:53 AM) *
That's brilliant !!!! biggrin.gif


It's very close what I usually say to folks (per earlier post) when they say I always wanted to play guitar, I just say "Me Too"! Sometimes people don't get it, or even react badly. But it's an honest response, if you want to play an instrument, why aren't you? If you still have the desire to play, (which is what I must assume when folks say they always wanted to play guitar) then grab a guitar and start playing! smile.gif I"ve actually said this to people, and gotten responses like


"It's too late for me"
"I don't have time"
"excuse, blah, excuse"

I've never known anyone to gain happiness by making excuses for themselves. Pointing this out can also have a negative response/reaction. I've had folks get honestly mad at me by this point. As if I"m a big JERK for encouraging them to do something they are saying that they "always wanted to do". I've come to believe people don't reallyl mean that. What they mean in many cases is "I always wanted to be the guy who had the drive to learn to play guitar", and that is something I can't help them with.


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Ben Higgins
post Nov 21 2011, 09:53 AM
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QUOTE (Todd Simpson @ Nov 20 2011, 10:26 PM) *
It's very close what I usually say to folks (per earlier post) when they say I always wanted to play guitar, I just say "Me Too"! Sometimes people don't get it, or even react badly. But it's an honest response, if you want to play an instrument, why aren't you? If you still have the desire to play, (which is what I must assume when folks say they always wanted to play guitar) then grab a guitar and start playing! smile.gif I"ve actually said this to people, and gotten responses like


"It's too late for me"
"I don't have time"
"excuse, blah, excuse"

I've never known anyone to gain happiness by making excuses for themselves. Pointing this out can also have a negative response/reaction. I've had folks get honestly mad at me by this point. As if I"m a big JERK for encouraging them to do something they are saying that they "always wanted to do". I've come to believe people don't reallyl mean that. What they mean in many cases is "I always wanted to be the guy who had the drive to learn to play guitar", and that is something I can't help them with.


Yeah, you're totally right, Todd. People get angry and defensive when they hear the truth. I think people just don't like taking responsibility for their own lives, because it's easier to blame lack of action/achievement on someone else, because then it's 'not your fault' and you don't have to do anything about it.

If you take responsibility for your own desicions though, then it's a double edged sword.. you have the power to get what you want but it means you have to go through some tough times to get there. A lot of people aren't willing to endure the tough times to get to what they want to so they take the easier route instead.. excuses, excuses etc..


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Blister
post Nov 22 2011, 02:19 PM
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To jawilco, Todd & Ben: Well said!!!! smile.gif smile.gif


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Cosmin Lupu
post Nov 24 2011, 09:48 AM
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QUOTE (Ben Higgins @ Nov 21 2011, 08:53 AM) *
Yeah, you're totally right, Todd. People get angry and defensive when they hear the truth. I think people just don't like taking responsibility for their own lives, because it's easier to blame lack of action/achievement on someone else, because then it's 'not your fault' and you don't have to do anything about it.

If you take responsibility for your own desicions though, then it's a double edged sword.. you have the power to get what you want but it means you have to go through some tough times to get there. A lot of people aren't willing to endure the tough times to get to what they want to so they take the easier route instead.. excuses, excuses etc..


True and well said Ben, but as we both know, excuses won't get you anywhere! So I guess that is no easy route - it's no route at all smile.gif


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Ben Higgins
post Nov 24 2011, 10:42 AM
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QUOTE (Cosmin Lupu @ Nov 24 2011, 09:48 AM) *
True and well said Ben, but as we both know, excuses won't get you anywhere! So I guess that is no easy route - it's no route at all smile.gif


Yes, absolutely.. the 'easy' route ends up being a curse of denial, regret etc.. it is difficult to be true to yourself because it envolves standing up for your beliefs, going against the grain, doing something that other people may not understand or believe in, having faith that you'll succeed even when it looks like you're not going anywhere.. all those lovely, character building things wink.gif

But then it has to be difficult, because it's the apprenticeship.. why should we be given the keys to our life without first showing we're worthy of handling the responsibilty ?


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