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> Lyrics Need Music
DarkWaveRiffer
post Apr 1 2012, 05:16 PM
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I write when the mood strikes me. I really want to bridge the gap between poems to lyrics. I don't really know phrasing.
I will share my lyrics first, but its not meant to be literal. I would really like to collab on bringing the baby to life. Let me know.

Beat the beauty
Now look at what you made me do
Squeezed it from you
Dripping nectar
down my hand
Its not my fault
Its not my fault
With your smug smiles
privileged
Porcelain skin
I know the answers
I know the answers
In your miserable world
You made me invisible
Divisible
A zero
I never belonged
You made that clear
Beat the beauty
Now I’m wrong
You cry for mercy
Now I’m wrong
I’ll squeeze the life
You took from me
Beat the beauty
No longer beautiful

This post has been edited by DarkWaveRiffer: Apr 1 2012, 05:16 PM


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Cosmin Lupu
post Apr 2 2012, 09:11 AM
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Hey man! Nice thought biggrin.gif do you have some music to go along with these? smile.gif I can think of something maybe DLC or Deftones oriented somehow!



QUOTE (DarkWaveRiffer @ Apr 1 2012, 04:16 PM) *
I write when the mood strikes me. I really want to bridge the gap between poems to lyrics. I don't really know phrasing.
I will share my lyrics first, but its not meant to be literal. I would really like to collab on bringing the baby to life. Let me know.

Beat the beauty
Now look at what you made me do
Squeezed it from you
Dripping nectar
down my hand
Its not my fault
Its not my fault
With your smug smiles
privileged
Porcelain skin
I know the answers
I know the answers
In your miserable world
You made me invisible
Divisible
A zero
I never belonged
You made that clear
Beat the beauty
Now I’m wrong
You cry for mercy
Now I’m wrong
I’ll squeeze the life
You took from me
Beat the beauty
No longer beautiful



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Ben Higgins
post Apr 2 2012, 09:24 AM
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I like those lyrics, very dark. Almost like something My Dying Bride would do smile.gif

Whatever music goes with it, I'm thinking it should be low. 80's pop metal like Ratt probably wouldn't be the right counterpart to this ? biggrin.gif

This post has been edited by Ben Higgins: Apr 2 2012, 09:25 AM


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DarkWaveRiffer
post Apr 3 2012, 03:28 AM
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QUOTE (Cosmin Lupu @ Apr 2 2012, 03:11 AM) *
Hey man! Nice thought biggrin.gif do you have some music to go along with these? smile.gif I can think of something maybe DLC or Deftones oriented somehow!


No, that's my problem, I can write all day, I just don't have the phrasing.I can come up with riffs on guitar, but not full musical expression. If I did, I know I could write to it. Any ways, you hit the nail on the head DLC, Deftones, or Chevelle. I was actually watching fight club when that Ed Norton beat the crap out of the pretty boy, and that's when I got inspired.


QUOTE (Ben Higgins @ Apr 2 2012, 03:24 AM) *
I like those lyrics, very dark. Almost like something My Dying Bride would do smile.gif

Whatever music goes with it, I'm thinking it should be low. 80's pop metal like Ratt probably wouldn't be the right counterpart to this ? biggrin.gif


I can see where you are coming from. Wow, I am glad I re-read you reply. I swear I read "Rat probably would be right counterpart".lol
My dying bride, I am not too familar with. I checked out some of their music, and it seems kind of goth, and the singer seems to speak more than sing. I like bands that are more vocal like Trouble, Chevelle, 10 Years, DLC. I know some may argue Chevelle doesn't sing, but they have great phrasing.

Like I said, I am up for a collab, do we have an vocalists here on the forum? Has gmc ever done a full song collab with vocals?


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Cosmin Lupu
post Apr 3 2012, 03:48 PM
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I am also a vocalist tongue.gif Kris can sing as well and we can make a vocal collab. Regarding the music, in my opinion it's easier to orchestrate some lyrics than to create some lyrics and a vocal line when having the chords already. I mean, it's like the lyrics are calling for a certain form and phrasing smile.gif when you have the chords only, the possibilities are ENDLESS. That being said smile.gif you can start analyzing the patterns appearing at DLC and Chevelle in their vocal lines smile.gif can you figure out repetitive ideas in their songs?


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SirJamsalot
post Apr 3 2012, 05:51 PM
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When you wrote this, did any type of musical melody inspire you while writing it? I mean, were you humming one day, and then one of the lines come out that you sang and then you finished the poem? Or did you write it without any musical melody in mind?

I find I'll be humming a tune that pops into my mind, then some wacky line will seem to fit the melody, then I use that as the chorus or hook to the song - the rest is a matter of coming up with a chord progression to back it.


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DarkWaveRiffer
post Apr 4 2012, 03:22 AM
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QUOTE (Cosmin Lupu @ Apr 3 2012, 09:48 AM) *
I am also a vocalist tongue.gif Kris can sing as well and we can make a vocal collab. Regarding the music, in my opinion it's easier to orchestrate some lyrics than to create some lyrics and a vocal line when having the chords already. I mean, it's like the lyrics are calling for a certain form and phrasing smile.gif when you have the chords only, the possibilities are ENDLESS. That being said smile.gif you can start analyzing the patterns appearing at DLC and Chevelle in their vocal lines smile.gif can you figure out repetitive ideas in their songs?


The lyrics were kind of inspired by The Meddler from Chevelle. The lyrics can be broken into phrasings. Where maybe an idea is built from a couple of lines.I will have to look at DLC, and Chevelle see if there is any phrasing patterns.


QUOTE (SirJamsalot @ Apr 3 2012, 11:51 AM) *
When you wrote this, did any type of musical melody inspire you while writing it? I mean, were you humming one day, and then one of the lines come out that you sang and then you finished the poem? Or did you write it without any musical melody in mind?

I find I'll be humming a tune that pops into my mind, then some wacky line will seem to fit the melody, then I use that as the chorus or hook to the song - the rest is a matter of coming up with a chord progression to back it.

No, I wish. I do have times, that I will be dreaming of a song that I have never heard before, and I will wake up, and if I am lucky I might remember some of the vocals, and melodies. I have been lucky enough to get to my guitar teacher, and have him put it to guitar. Even my own dreams , the music I come up with is to hard for me to play. lol I am trying to think of vocal phrasings, and see if I can come up with ideas. I usually get hit with a feeling that I am compelled to write,and usually because something struck me emotionally, and I just start writing.


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Cosmin Lupu
post Apr 5 2012, 03:23 PM
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Bro, I am in the opposite situation with this track I am workin on, for which I have to create vocal lines and new lyrics.

What you hear in there is some mumbling which my band mate tried and we shall start from that biggrin.gif I will think a bit on the process as I am going through it and will let you know on how things are looking from the other side (not having the lyrics but having the complete detailed track) we can exchange ideas and maybe we can both reach our desired goals wink.gif will upload on soundcloud soon!

what say you?

Cosmin

This post has been edited by Cosmin Lupu: Apr 5 2012, 03:24 PM


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DarkWaveRiffer
post Apr 6 2012, 03:04 PM
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QUOTE (Cosmin Lupu @ Apr 5 2012, 09:23 AM) *
Bro, I am in the opposite situation with this track I am workin on, for which I have to create vocal lines and new lyrics.

What you hear in there is some mumbling which my band mate tried and we shall start from that biggrin.gif I will think a bit on the process as I am going through it and will let you know on how things are looking from the other side (not having the lyrics but having the complete detailed track) we can exchange ideas and maybe we can both reach our desired goals wink.gif will upload on soundcloud soon!

what say you?

Cosmin


Sure, I can take a listen, and see what I come up with. BTW the other day I was at work, and all the sudden I heard in my head this phrasing, it was a simple verse, kind of something I might hear a child say, but the vocal melody was interesting. It was stuck in my head, but I knew if I didn't get it recorded I would lose it. So I ran down to the parking garage, got into my car, and recorded the vocal phrasing in my phone.


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The Uncreator
post Apr 7 2012, 02:57 AM
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QUOTE (DarkWaveRiffer @ Apr 1 2012, 12:16 PM) *
I write when the mood strikes me. I really want to bridge the gap between poems to lyrics. I don't really know phrasing.
I will share my lyrics first, but its not meant to be literal. I would really like to collab on bringing the baby to life. Let me know.

Beat the beauty
Now look at what you made me do
Squeezed it from you
Dripping nectar
down my hand
Its not my fault
Its not my fault
With your smug smiles
privileged
Porcelain skin
I know the answers
I know the answers
In your miserable world
You made me invisible
Divisible
A zero
I never belonged
You made that clear
Beat the beauty
Now I’m wrong
You cry for mercy
Now I’m wrong
I’ll squeeze the life
You took from me
Beat the beauty
No longer beautiful


As for phrasing.... this would be what I would for a typical 4/4 - four line structure

Now look at what you made me do, forced to take it from you (More syllables, beginning of sung will have some more vocal attack)
Dripping nectar down my hand - Its not my fault (only once sung, to bring separation amongst words and leave room for held notes)
With your smug smiles privileged, and opaque Porcelain skin (just adding descriptors to fill in rhythmical ideas)
Saddened eyes deceive, the meek who look without sight (something I just threw out to keep the lyrics on a physical descriptor passage)

I know the answers in your miserable world (a single line break, to initiate a quick transfer of tempo, riff or structure)

You made me invisible
Divisible
A zero
I never belonged
It's perfectly clear/ intentions now clear/ you spoke without words (Ideas simply to add variety to syllabic phrasing and subtlety)

Destroy the beauty
Now I’m wrong
You cry for mercy
Now I’m wrong
I’ll squeeze the life
You took from me
Consume the beauty
You stole from me (Pure alliteration, I love doing this as it can so easily add tension and anger to a line)

No longer, is there beauty (Classic one line ending to accent the overall feel of a song, a favorite of mine)


This makes it seem quite shorter, although that doesnt mean anything. I've written less lyrics for 14 minute songs, its all about the attack and delivery.

Phrasing is exactly the same as it is with guitar, think of the vocals as purely another instrument. Each syllable is equivalent to one note, and these syllables can be held to have different values such as 8th, 16th, and so on.

When structuring music around lyrics, its best to arrange a rhythmic passage for the words. Pick up a guitar and just play as you sing, you will probably start out purely accenting the words, then the ideas come. You settle on a good idea, stop repeating the rhythmic phrasing for the lyrics and mature the riff a bit more. In time, this process will be completely eliminated and it will be mental and muscle memory.

Now when I sit back and look at lyrics I've written, I know their purpose, so I know the musics purpose.

These lyrics are contemplative, and angry. But I want contrast, so I will have a riff that is softer, more melodic.

Or

These lyrics are narrative, and making a statement. I want to accent this so I will put force into these riffs.


It's more about understanding yourself, and bringing your mental image into fruition that it is about learning a technique. I honestly think composition can not be taught for 99% of what it is, for our compositions are a reflection of ourselves, and no one can teach you about how you think.

Experimentation is key! I wrote and recorded over 40 songs before I really realized what I was doing. I sat here on GMC for a good 2 years listening to instructors, members, and even the great Kris himself ( tongue.gif ) tell me what they liked and didnt like about my songs.

In the beginning its harsh, I spent a week on one song only to have it riddled with obvious problem to others, so it does kind of hurt. But be stubborn, it pays off.

That feeling of creation, of completing a song. I can live off it smile.gif


Sorry....I rambled laugh.gif
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Cosmin Lupu
post Apr 7 2012, 08:04 AM
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Oh man! You took this to another level biggrin.gif no rambling at all, I am learning something out of your ideas as well smile.gif

thanks

Cosmin

QUOTE (The Uncreator @ Apr 7 2012, 01:57 AM) *
As for phrasing.... this would be what I would for a typical 4/4 - four line structure

Now look at what you made me do, forced to take it from you (More syllables, beginning of sung will have some more vocal attack)
Dripping nectar down my hand - Its not my fault (only once sung, to bring separation amongst words and leave room for held notes)
With your smug smiles privileged, and opaque Porcelain skin (just adding descriptors to fill in rhythmical ideas)
Saddened eyes deceive, the meek who look without sight (something I just threw out to keep the lyrics on a physical descriptor passage)

I know the answers in your miserable world (a single line break, to initiate a quick transfer of tempo, riff or structure)

You made me invisible
Divisible
A zero
I never belonged
It's perfectly clear/ intentions now clear/ you spoke without words (Ideas simply to add variety to syllabic phrasing and subtlety)

Destroy the beauty
Now I’m wrong
You cry for mercy
Now I’m wrong
I’ll squeeze the life
You took from me
Consume the beauty
You stole from me (Pure alliteration, I love doing this as it can so easily add tension and anger to a line)

No longer, is there beauty (Classic one line ending to accent the overall feel of a song, a favorite of mine)


This makes it seem quite shorter, although that doesnt mean anything. I've written less lyrics for 14 minute songs, its all about the attack and delivery.

Phrasing is exactly the same as it is with guitar, think of the vocals as purely another instrument. Each syllable is equivalent to one note, and these syllables can be held to have different values such as 8th, 16th, and so on.

When structuring music around lyrics, its best to arrange a rhythmic passage for the words. Pick up a guitar and just play as you sing, you will probably start out purely accenting the words, then the ideas come. You settle on a good idea, stop repeating the rhythmic phrasing for the lyrics and mature the riff a bit more. In time, this process will be completely eliminated and it will be mental and muscle memory.

Now when I sit back and look at lyrics I've written, I know their purpose, so I know the musics purpose.

These lyrics are contemplative, and angry. But I want contrast, so I will have a riff that is softer, more melodic.

Or

These lyrics are narrative, and making a statement. I want to accent this so I will put force into these riffs.


It's more about understanding yourself, and bringing your mental image into fruition that it is about learning a technique. I honestly think composition can not be taught for 99% of what it is, for our compositions are a reflection of ourselves, and no one can teach you about how you think.

Experimentation is key! I wrote and recorded over 40 songs before I really realized what I was doing. I sat here on GMC for a good 2 years listening to instructors, members, and even the great Kris himself ( tongue.gif ) tell me what they liked and didnt like about my songs.

In the beginning its harsh, I spent a week on one song only to have it riddled with obvious problem to others, so it does kind of hurt. But be stubborn, it pays off.

That feeling of creation, of completing a song. I can live off it smile.gif


Sorry....I rambled laugh.gif



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DarkWaveRiffer
post Apr 7 2012, 04:17 PM
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Thanks UC! You gave me a lot to think about, and you filled in some of the blanks I have been thinking about.
Voice is another instrument, so makes sense it follows the same rules of timing.
So with my poem, I can use as a basis for lyrics, but I realize now it won't be 100% adpatable, but thats ok.
Now I have a pretty idea on how to do this.
Thanks!


QUOTE (The Uncreator @ Apr 6 2012, 08:57 PM) *
As for phrasing.... this would be what I would for a typical 4/4 - four line structure

Now look at what you made me do, forced to take it from you (More syllables, beginning of sung will have some more vocal attack)
Dripping nectar down my hand - Its not my fault (only once sung, to bring separation amongst words and leave room for held notes)
With your smug smiles privileged, and opaque Porcelain skin (just adding descriptors to fill in rhythmical ideas)
Saddened eyes deceive, the meek who look without sight (something I just threw out to keep the lyrics on a physical descriptor passage)

I know the answers in your miserable world (a single line break, to initiate a quick transfer of tempo, riff or structure)

You made me invisible
Divisible
A zero
I never belonged
It's perfectly clear/ intentions now clear/ you spoke without words (Ideas simply to add variety to syllabic phrasing and subtlety)

Destroy the beauty
Now I’m wrong
You cry for mercy
Now I’m wrong
I’ll squeeze the life
You took from me
Consume the beauty
You stole from me (Pure alliteration, I love doing this as it can so easily add tension and anger to a line)

No longer, is there beauty (Classic one line ending to accent the overall feel of a song, a favorite of mine)


This makes it seem quite shorter, although that doesnt mean anything. I've written less lyrics for 14 minute songs, its all about the attack and delivery.

Phrasing is exactly the same as it is with guitar, think of the vocals as purely another instrument. Each syllable is equivalent to one note, and these syllables can be held to have different values such as 8th, 16th, and so on.

When structuring music around lyrics, its best to arrange a rhythmic passage for the words. Pick up a guitar and just play as you sing, you will probably start out purely accenting the words, then the ideas come. You settle on a good idea, stop repeating the rhythmic phrasing for the lyrics and mature the riff a bit more. In time, this process will be completely eliminated and it will be mental and muscle memory.

Now when I sit back and look at lyrics I've written, I know their purpose, so I know the musics purpose.

These lyrics are contemplative, and angry. But I want contrast, so I will have a riff that is softer, more melodic.

Or

These lyrics are narrative, and making a statement. I want to accent this so I will put force into these riffs.


It's more about understanding yourself, and bringing your mental image into fruition that it is about learning a technique. I honestly think composition can not be taught for 99% of what it is, for our compositions are a reflection of ourselves, and no one can teach you about how you think.

Experimentation is key! I wrote and recorded over 40 songs before I really realized what I was doing. I sat here on GMC for a good 2 years listening to instructors, members, and even the great Kris himself ( tongue.gif ) tell me what they liked and didnt like about my songs.

In the beginning its harsh, I spent a week on one song only to have it riddled with obvious problem to others, so it does kind of hurt. But be stubborn, it pays off.

That feeling of creation, of completing a song. I can live off it smile.gif


Sorry....I rambled laugh.gif



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The Uncreator
post Apr 7 2012, 04:19 PM
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Hey no problem! Just check out the beginning pages of the lyric boards, my writing was pretty terrible back then laugh.gif

This is more mature if this where you are starting out which is good, I notice you didnt force rhymes in there which is often. Remember, the meaning is first, the "rhyme" is always last.

I think some people often forget that, rather have a good message that rhyming words.
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DarkWaveRiffer
post Apr 7 2012, 05:13 PM
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I have always been more free verse, and it's rare, but I have written full rhyming poems, but only if that's the way it comes out.
I don't like being limited. The message to me always come first, but I write in such a way that many interpretations can come from it. Which I prefer because it means different things to people. Other than force them to see if how you want.

QUOTE (The Uncreator @ Apr 7 2012, 10:19 AM) *
Hey no problem! Just check out the beginning pages of the lyric boards, my writing was pretty terrible back then laugh.gif

This is more mature if this where you are starting out which is good, I notice you didnt force rhymes in there which is often. Remember, the meaning is first, the "rhyme" is always last.

I think some people often forget that, rather have a good message that rhyming words.



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The Uncreator
post Apr 7 2012, 05:17 PM
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I know what you mean, I don't like being direct about my choice of words. I have an obsession with Sci-Fi so I like to wrap everything up in that atmosphere.
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Cosmin Lupu
post Apr 9 2012, 09:28 AM
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What are your favorite writing subjects Dwr? biggrin.gif


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DarkWaveRiffer
post Apr 9 2012, 02:42 PM
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I write about what comes to me. Its a mood that strikes me. Most often its about something I am going through.
Some kind of struggle, loss, disappointment, search for purpose, lost love,Hypocricy, Goverment Conspiracies....


Here is another one I wrote last week.

Tomorrow never comes
And we will never die
A mantra they have embraced
For when rich men call to arms
We all fall upon our own swords
And call it our enemies
We hide in plain sight
From the truths that plague us
That we can never change
We can never rise
History repeats
Crushed in their palm
Pressed ashes of those we reminisce
It all coincides
Lest we forget
Our dreams
Pray never wake
To see the horrors dressed in white
Veiled in their true intentions
Selling short a destiny
There are no gods
They killed them all
Our prayers unanswered
On the borrowed time
We are out of time
A dream script conspiracy
Mirrors and plays
On our anxieties
Only to hijack our minds
And decimate our souls.
Can you hear me?
They keep calling our names
Serving their whims on the backs of the whimpering
Look at what they built
They scream, “I will not be denied!”
Upon the broken, and discarded
They reach to touch the sky
To touch the sky, they wonder why,
As our world dies.

I love how Nickelback writes, but I don't have that style. I am not sure my style.

QUOTE (Cosmin Lupu @ Apr 9 2012, 03:28 AM) *
What are your favorite writing subjects Dwr? biggrin.gif



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Cosmin Lupu
post Apr 10 2012, 12:06 PM
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QUOTE (DarkWaveRiffer @ Apr 9 2012, 01:42 PM) *
I write about what comes to me. Its a mood that strikes me. Most often its about something I am going through.
Some kind of struggle, loss, disappointment, search for purpose, lost love,Hypocricy, Goverment Conspiracies....


Here is another one I wrote last week.

Tomorrow never comes
And we will never die
A mantra they have embraced
For when rich men call to arms
We all fall upon our own swords
And call it our enemies
We hide in plain sight
From the truths that plague us
That we can never change
We can never rise
History repeats
Crushed in their palm
Pressed ashes of those we reminisce
It all coincides
Lest we forget
Our dreams
Pray never wake
To see the horrors dressed in white
Veiled in their true intentions
Selling short a destiny
There are no gods
They killed them all
Our prayers unanswered
On the borrowed time
We are out of time
A dream script conspiracy
Mirrors and plays
On our anxieties
Only to hijack our minds
And decimate our souls.
Can you hear me?
They keep calling our names
Serving their whims on the backs of the whimpering
Look at what they built
They scream, “I will not be denied!”
Upon the broken, and discarded
They reach to touch the sky
To touch the sky, they wonder why,
As our world dies.

I love how Nickelback writes, but I don't have that style. I am not sure my style.


I usually write about stuff which happened to me, when it comes down to lyrics - I think it's the most honest way to write smile.gif you cant't go wrong when writing about your own experiences in life, right?

Cosmin


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