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> Public Opinions, In Which we discuss how we think others perceive us.
Doug Lane
post Dec 29 2013, 05:20 AM
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Hi GMC! Love you all smile.gif

I thought it would be a good Idea for us to discuss the way we think others think about us when they first meet us.
In the human experience, very little in conveyed on first encounters. Assuming (since you are even here to see this post) you are an extremely dedicated musician, how do you feel that the average person feels about their chance encounter with you? In my opinion this can be really important in cultivating a great public presence, which is necessary for a good musician. If you have any insights into how this sort of experience is for you, please leave a comment on it. I'd love to hear how you all feel about meeting new people, and how easily what you are all about translates into your behavior.

This post has been edited by Doug Lane: Dec 29 2013, 06:02 AM


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PosterBoy
post Dec 29 2013, 09:10 AM
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I think that most of the time (when I'm not preoccupied with something) the average person feels a whole lot better about the interaction than I think I've done. I tend to beat myself up about stuff when looking in hindsight though laugh.gif

If you can learn to be genuinely interested in other people and their lives, you'll gain friends and fans.

The golden rule is to make the other person feel better about themselves than they did before the interaction with you. That is definitely one thing I'm trying to keep reminding myself every day, I have friends for whom this is natural, for me not so much!

This post has been edited by PosterBoy: Dec 29 2013, 09:14 AM


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klasaine
post Dec 29 2013, 09:37 AM
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QUOTE (PosterBoy @ Dec 29 2013, 12:10 AM) *
If you can learn to be genuinely interested in other people and their lives, you'll gain friends and fans.


+1
I learned a long time ago that 'to be an interesting person one only needs to be interested'.

What's the most common line a performer on a stage will utter? ... "Hey, how you all doin' out there?" Applause, applause, applause ...


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Cosmin Lupu
post Dec 29 2013, 10:39 AM
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There are a few aspects regarding this idea smile.gif I learned that throughout my life, I will learn from EVERYONE. For me, one of the most important things in life is meeting people and hearing their stories, receiving their energy - if it's good, of course and sharing some of mine. You cannot evolve as a human being if you are locked up in a shell and not opening up to people, especially as a person who strives for becoming or considers him/herself an artist. A great encounter can lead to the creation of a great song that has a great story behind it. That's worth more than a million notes smile.gif

On the other hand, as an artist, you have a great responsibility on your shoulders. You are an icon and people see you that way. What you do and what you say can be taken as a holy word by many... literally. I think it's important to realize this and allow selflessness to kick in and set an example for everyone.


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Taka Perry
post Dec 29 2013, 12:53 PM
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I think as musicians its hard to see music from a non musicians perspective. I listen to some songs, and I might thing this part sounds a bit out of tune or something, but the average person doesn't seem to notice. I guess what I'm saying is that often we worry about small flaws in our musicianship, and lose track of the big picture. So I've learnt from experience to not be so critical on yourself, but be realistic and don't be too pretentious. People probably don't see these flaws unless you specifically tell them.


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PosterBoy
post Dec 29 2013, 01:03 PM
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QUOTE (Cosmin Lupu @ Dec 29 2013, 09:39 AM) *
There are a few aspects regarding this idea smile.gif I learned that throughout my life, I will learn from EVERYONE. For me, one of the most important things in life is meeting people and hearing their stories, receiving their energy - if it's good, of course and sharing some of mine. You cannot evolve as a human being if you are locked up in a shell and not opening up to people, especially as a person who strives for becoming or considers him/herself an artist. A great encounter can lead to the creation of a great song that has a great story behind it. That's worth more than a million notes smile.gif

On the other hand, as an artist, you have a great responsibility on your shoulders. You are an icon and people see you that way. What you do and what you say can be taken as a holy word by many... literally. I think it's important to realize this and allow selflessness to kick in and set an example for everyone.



So you're saying Don't sleep with your groupies or do sleep with them?



laugh.gif


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Gabriel Leopardi
post Dec 29 2013, 06:34 PM
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QUOTE (Cosmin Lupu @ Dec 29 2013, 06:39 AM) *
There are a few aspects regarding this idea smile.gif I learned that throughout my life, I will learn from EVERYONE. For me, one of the most important things in life is meeting people and hearing their stories, receiving their energy - if it's good, of course and sharing some of mine. You cannot evolve as a human being if you are locked up in a shell and not opening up to people, especially as a person who strives for becoming or considers him/herself an artist. A great encounter can lead to the creation of a great song that has a great story behind it. That's worth more than a million notes smile.gif

On the other hand, as an artist, you have a great responsibility on your shoulders. You are an icon and people see you that way. What you do and what you say can be taken as a holy word by many... literally. I think it's important to realize this and allow selflessness to kick in and set an example for everyone.



Wise words mate. This is something that I learnt with the pass of time. In the old days, I was very obsessive, and used to stay inside of my bedroom, playing guitar, alone without too many "outside" experiences, and then I started to realize that I was a very technician musician but with not too much to tell. Time taught me how much you grow by interacting with other people and from real world experiences, and that's how you become a better person, and this is the only way you can be a good artist. Reciprocity is the key for truth creativity in music and in life. The only way to live your life with more quality. smile.gif


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Doug Lane
post Dec 29 2013, 07:06 PM
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These are some very good observations! People tell me that at first I can seem aloof, but that quickly changes when I decide what to say. I think it is very important to choose your words wisely whenever you speak, and always remain thoughtful. The single-mindedness required to succeed in something like music needs a little introversion to some degree I'm sure. It's listening to that same inner voice that I make music with that helps me convey my ambitions and intentions, as well as the esteem I regard everyone I meet with.


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Darius Wave
post Dec 30 2013, 10:16 AM
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I agree with most that had been said in the topic. As for me I'm usually very open. I always start with the belief that the other person is a positive one. Of course sometimes I do disappoint but anyway I think there is a lot more of kind and really cool people out there. First impression is very important but some of us have a black humor and it can make a wrong image of a character. Usually it gets clear after some time smile.gif

As for the people who support You...I agree...we have to take care of them as well. Listeners like to find something in common with their lives in our music. Especially easy with the lyrics ..not as obvious with instrumental but still...similar relation. When You find a support not only in the music but in the person as well, You get connected to it and Your relation becomes something more.

Though I've never had an opportunity to make friendship with Paul Gilbert, I always felt related not only to his playing but to his sense of humor too smile.gif This is why I enjoy him (as a person) as much as his playing (even if sometimes it reminds a sound of a drill too much tongue.gif ).

Now I've been noticed that some people thought I'm very serious watching my videos (not all of course)., It's an exact opposite of what I am in real life. Some serious and "angry" face mimic comes with natural focus on playing. It can create an atmosphere of being a douchbag biggrin.gif


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Cosmin Lupu
post Dec 30 2013, 11:55 AM
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QUOTE (Darius Wave @ Dec 30 2013, 10:16 AM) *
I agree with most that had been said in the topic. As for me I'm usually very open. I always start with the belief that the other person is a positive one. Of course sometimes I do disappoint but anyway I think there is a lot more of kind and really cool people out there. First impression is very important but some of us have a black humor and it can make a wrong image of a character. Usually it gets clear after some time smile.gif

As for the people who support You...I agree...we have to take care of them as well. Listeners like to find something in common with their lives in our music. Especially easy with the lyrics ..not as obvious with instrumental but still...similar relation. When You find a support not only in the music but in the person as well, You get connected to it and Your relation becomes something more.

Though I've never had an opportunity to make friendship with Paul Gilbert, I always felt related not only to his playing but to his sense of humor too smile.gif This is why I enjoy him (as a person) as much as his playing (even if sometimes it reminds a sound of a drill too much tongue.gif ).

Now I've been noticed that some people thought I'm very serious watching my videos (not all of course)., It's an exact opposite of what I am in real life. Some serious and "angry" face mimic comes with natural focus on playing. It can create an atmosphere of being a douchbag biggrin.gif


So biggrin.gif Mr. D, tell us more about Mr. Gilbert - should we expect some guest appearance soon? biggrin.gif biggrin.gif


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jstcrsn
post Dec 30 2013, 12:26 PM
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QUOTE (Darius Wave @ Dec 30 2013, 10:16 AM) *
. It can create an atmosphere of being a douchbag biggrin.gif

is douchbag on of those words that should be underlined for explanation huh.gif
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Cosmin Lupu
post Dec 30 2013, 12:38 PM
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QUOTE (jstcrsn @ Dec 30 2013, 12:26 PM) *
is douchbag on of those words that should be underlined for explanation huh.gif


A few days ago, I met an american guy that explained THE EXACT meaning of the word and it cannot be explained here smile.gif


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Headbanger
post Dec 30 2013, 12:56 PM
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I think its important to be yourself whenever and whatever situation you are in. I do that. Then you know if someone likes you or not for the correct reasons . IMO Its not healthy to pretend to be someone else. Relax with who you are and those who meet you should be relaxed with you. I usually get on well with people that I meet...at least that's what I think! laugh.gif


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Darius Wave
post Dec 30 2013, 12:56 PM
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ha ha biggrin.gif Let's just end up with "unpleasant guy" tongue.gif


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Taka Perry
post Dec 30 2013, 01:27 PM
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QUOTE (Headbanger @ Dec 30 2013, 10:56 PM) *
I think its important to be yourself whenever and whatever situation you are in. I do that. Then you know if someone likes you or not for the correct reasons . IMO Its not healthy to pretend to be someone else. Relax with who you are and those who meet you should be relaxed with you. I usually get on well with people that I meet...at least that's what I think! laugh.gif


I agree with you. Being yourself is important. The people who matter won't mind, the people who mind don't matter biggrin.gif


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PosterBoy
post Dec 30 2013, 02:59 PM
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I say be your BEST self


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klasaine
post Dec 30 2013, 06:33 PM
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What does David Lee Roth say? "Sincerity is the name of the game ... and once you can fake that you've got it made"


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AK Rich
post Dec 30 2013, 06:55 PM
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QUOTE (klasaine @ Dec 30 2013, 09:33 AM) *
What does David Lee Roth say? "Sincerity is the name of the game ... and once you can fake that you've got it made"

laugh.gif I was just thinking that some of the approaches discussed in this thread are also tools of the con artist, unfortunately.
Edit: I just wanted to clarify that I in no way was suggesting that anyone here was a con artist. biggrin.gif

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klasaine
post Dec 30 2013, 08:56 PM
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I'm suggesting all performers are. It's the nature of the beast ... and not necessarily a bad thing.


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Cosmin Lupu
post Dec 31 2013, 12:32 PM
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QUOTE (klasaine @ Dec 30 2013, 07:56 PM) *
I'm suggesting all performers are. It's the nature of the beast ... and not necessarily a bad thing.


I just remembered an interview with Till from Rammstein saying that they are characters on a stage putting up a show - as outrageous as possible - because people don't give a damn about who they are in real life. People want circus smile.gif Just like in ancient Rome... I think that this is one category, as or instance an artist such as Michael Bubble can't be outrageous onstage biggrin.gif so he must surely fall into another bunch smile.gif Is it wrong to place people into boxes...? I think it is .. a bit.. biggrin.gif


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