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> Stereotypes And Music, Has anyone had a bad experience?
rokchik
post Dec 13 2007, 02:49 AM
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Ok I meant to write this post a couple of days ago but I was still so angry that I couldn't....they would have had to add more moderators in order to edit the post I'm sure smile.gif Anyways I'm a bit more calm about the whole thing now...kind of...so here goes.

This past weekend I attended a christmas party. It was at a local pub and was kind of a private party thrown by a friend of mine. There were a couple of guys there I didn't know who were playing guitar. One on electric and one on electric-acoustic. They weren't horrible but they weren't that great either. The type of guys who get better the more drinks you consume if you know what I mean. Anyways after about a half hour they decided to take a break, however they said if anyone knew how to play they were more then welcome to do so. This is where all the fun started....

My friend came over to me and said I should get up and play. I usually don't play in front of anyone as get nervous but I had consumed a few bottles of liquid courage so said why not smile.gif Well the boys were just putting the guitars away and talking to a few folks when I approached the "gentleman" with the acoustic-electric (Oh I use the term gentlemen very very lightly...I'm just trying not to curse.) I asked him if I could play a few songs while he was on break. Well this "gentleman" first looked at me like I had just slapped him in the face and then stole his car, before getting the most smartass smirk on his face. He turned to his buddy whinked and said...and this is pretty much an exact quote..." well sweetheart we don't want to hear any of that Celine Dion crap here. These folks want rock music so why don't you go back to your shirley temple and let the men play the songs. Besides I wouldn't want you to break a nail while playing this guitar." The two had a pretty big laugh.

Well none of you really know me, only from the forum and a few chats, but I'm a pretty happy go lucky type of person. Nothing really bothers me all that much and MOST stuff will wash right off my back with maybe only a sarcastic comment just to get a dig in. But that comment had me so angry that words can not really discribe it. I don't know what made me more mad, the fact that he assumed I couldn't play or the fact that he figured all I knew was wuss rock cause I was a girl...besides I have no nails to break...I play to many sports where nails get in the way smile.gif I sort of stood there for a moment with a flabergasted look on my face as it turned a very dark shade of plum according to a friend. The juke box came on as they walked away still laughing to themselves about the funny joke they made. I walked away still a bit in awe about what had just happened when rage struck me like a ton of bricks. My friend tried to calm me down but I wanted blood. My boyfriend decided that this was a good time to take me home so we left. Well actually we just went outside until I calmed down a bit.....then I went back in. smile.gif

The boys got back up a few minutes later as people wanted them to play some more...I moved up front. Well this is when the "gentleman" decided his joke would be more funny if he shared with the crowd. Well there were a few laughs but a couple people said to let me play. He agreed...as he figured I'd be booed off the stage. I'm not the greatest guitar player by any means and I didn't play anything to technical but I did prove my point. I grabbed the "gentlemans" guitar...held it the wrong way on purpose....then kind of laughed as I corrected my hold and played the opening bit of Gabriels Muse lesson to warm up before jumping into "Over the Hills and Far Away" Wasn't the best version of the song as only one guitar but it was enough to impress the crowd and leave the "gentlemans" mouth wide open. I followed with Wonderwall, Laid, Cecilia, Nautical Disaster by the Tragically Hip, Everlong and Creep. My last 2 songs were A**hole by Dennis Leary and Bitch by Meredith Brooks just because I thought it was fitting. I put the guitar on the stand and flicked the pick at buddy as I walked by...I left right after. He caught up with me though in the parking lot while I waited for my cab and apologized....a bit late but life is too short. But it did take me a few days to calm down smile.gif

I think a lot of people may be able to relate to this story as I'm sure more then a few of us have been stereotyped in our lives. I mean this guy had no idea who I was but figured it was better to act big in front of his friends instead of just letting me play when I asked. I didn't play anything difficult but I did enough so he looked the complete idiot. Like I said I'm not a great guitar player but I know the crowd liked what I played and I played it well.

Does anyone have a similar story of how you were stereotyped when it comes to playing guitar...or even the music you listen too? I posted this in the ladies forum as I know I've had a lot more sterotypes thrown at me for being a women then anything else.(and I'm sure some of the ladies can agree to this) Please keep things friendly as I'm not intending this to be a flaming thread or hurtful towards anyone. And also please keep this a music/guitar related topic.

Thanks for letting me babble with this very long post

rok

PS: Gabriel I've had about 20 people ask me about your Muse lesson. I gave them links to Cirse and also told them they should join GMC biggrin.gif

EDIT: I also wanted to add that if it wasn't for this site and all I've learned the last 9 months or so I never would have agreed to get up in the first place let alone do what I did. Gabriel and all the other instructors thanks for being here and thanks for all the wonderful lessons you produce for us to learn. smile.gif smile.gif And Kris well what is there to say...the biggest thanks goes to you for this site and everything it offers.

This post has been edited by rokchik: Dec 13 2007, 03:42 AM
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nickmarx12345678
post Dec 13 2007, 02:59 AM
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Bummer man that sucks! I gotta say if a girl came up to me at a gig and asked to play I would be like sweet! go crazy! I think girls playing guitar is really cool. not sure why but it just seems fun to watch a girl rock out.

This post has been edited by nickmarx12345678: Dec 13 2007, 02:59 AM


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The Uncreator
post Dec 13 2007, 03:08 AM
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Man, im glad you showed them up, way to go!

As for similar story's....

_ _ _ _

Well a few months ago, a kid brought in his guitar and amp to class was playing, last day before thanksgiving break, teacher didnt care. I was being polite to him, commented on how i liked his gear and walked away. As i was finishing up some random drawing. and i heard him mention something about on how a Metallica song was played (He was debating with a friend over a certain riff, the master of puupets one), all i said was "Thats the right way, except the riff isn't two open pedaled notes, it goes from an open E to F, fret 0 to 1 as the two palm muted notes in the riff instead of two open notes"

I said it politely, and the kid says, "Shut up, what the hell do you know, you listen to that Cannibal Corpse Sh**." (i was wearing my cannibal corpse t-shirt.

Well, my first thought, was "Jesus what crawled up this kids ass and died?" , second thought was "Why the hell does everyone assume since i listen to death metal i have no taste in music? I listen stuff from SRV to Dying Fetus and everything in between. im always stereotyped as the no-talent-hack Death Metal kid at my school, and it pisses me off".....The kid said something else that pissed me off, about how i probably suck at guitar, so i said if he had any balls like a real man, he'd let me play his guitar.....So he did, and i dont wanna brag, but i embarrassed this kid BAD.

Im not claiming to be the best, but i played the hardest song i could think of.....Necrophagist's "Foul Body Autopsy". After i finished the short 2 minutes or so song, everyone was laughing at him, and i just walked away and said nothing.

PS
The solo to that song, no i did not play it full speed tongue.gif Ive only got the rest of the song up to speed, the sweeps were played considerably slower.

This post has been edited by The Uncreator: Dec 13 2007, 03:11 AM
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Guitarman700
post Dec 13 2007, 03:10 AM
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Idiocy is more common than carbon.


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The Uncreator
post Dec 13 2007, 03:12 AM
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QUOTE (Guitarman700 @ Dec 12 2007, 06:10 PM) *
Idiocy is more common than carbon.


I love that quote! laugh.gif
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rokchik
post Dec 13 2007, 03:14 AM
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QUOTE (Guitarman700 @ Dec 12 2007, 10:10 PM) *
Idiocy is more common than carbon.


Oh how true how true ! biggrin.gif tongue.gif

@ The Uncreator.....how could anyone argue metal with you?????????? That's just foolish and unwise. smile.gif
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Guitarman700
post Dec 13 2007, 03:14 AM
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QUOTE (The Uncreator @ Dec 12 2007, 09:12 PM) *
I love that quote! laugh.gif

its from frank zappa.


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The Uncreator
post Dec 13 2007, 03:18 AM
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QUOTE (rokchik @ Dec 12 2007, 06:14 PM) *
Oh how true how true ! biggrin.gif tongue.gif

@ The Uncreator.....how could anyone argue metal with you?????????? That's just foolish and unwise. smile.gif


Thanks smile.gif

People like this just assume they are better, or assume someone cant play, and when you prove them wrong, oh its so sweet laugh.gif
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SLASH91
post Dec 13 2007, 03:22 AM
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QUOTE (nickmarx12345678 @ Dec 12 2007, 07:59 PM) *
Bummer man that sucks! I gotta say if a girl came up to me at a gig and asked to play I would be like sweet! go crazy! I think girls playing guitar is really cool. not sure why but it just seems fun to watch a girl rock out.


I'm of the same oppinion with you; a girl playing guitar is awesome. That guy who said that was either a complete idiot or stone drunk...maybe a little of both.

This post has been edited by SLASH91: Dec 13 2007, 03:22 AM


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ibanezkiller
post Dec 13 2007, 03:22 AM
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Yeah i get that stuff all the time with being a metal fan and all. And people are like oh Metallica bet you you can't name two of their songs... yeah i was only able to name 47!!!! I won 20 dollars there...


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rokchik
post Dec 13 2007, 03:22 AM
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QUOTE (The Uncreator @ Dec 12 2007, 10:18 PM) *
Thanks smile.gif

People like this just assume they are better, or assume someone cant play, and when you prove them wrong, oh its so sweet laugh.gif


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smile.gif biggrin.gif tongue.gif laugh.gif
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The Uncreator
post Dec 13 2007, 03:24 AM
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Cost of Ownage - $0 laugh.gif
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rokchik
post Dec 13 2007, 03:28 AM
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QUOTE (SLASH91 @ Dec 12 2007, 10:22 PM) *
I'm of the same oppinion with you; a girl playing guitar is awesome. That guy who said that was either a complete idiot or stone drunk...maybe a little of both.


I'd probably go with a lot from colum A and a little from colum B smile.gif

QUOTE
Yeah i get that stuff all the time with being a metal fan and all. And people are like oh Metallica bet you you can't name two of their songs... yeah i was only able to name 47!!!! I won 20 dollars there...


Good for you man. Metal fans do get a bad rep don't they?

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laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif

This post has been edited by rokchik: Dec 13 2007, 03:29 AM
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Robin
post Dec 13 2007, 03:36 AM
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Hahaha excellent story rokchik!! Its great that you showed them that you can rock!!

The uncreator, also a funny story. Its sick that some people are so stupid. I bet its a relief emberrassing them like that laugh.gif


I dont really have any good stories, other than that people might be a bit surprised when I tell them what music I like.
Like when I first discovered Odd Nordstoga(norwegian folk/rock/pop artist, everyone at my age hates him).
I was listening to it, and I got "Show what I'm listening to" enabled msn so that my contacts can see what I'm listening to. I dont know how many people that said to me "Wtf?? Are you listening to odd nordstoga?? LOL!!!"... My band mates and many of my other friends laugh.gif
Just because I have long hair, and play in a black metal band they expect me to listen only to black metal tongue.gif

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ibanezkiller
post Dec 13 2007, 03:39 AM
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QUOTE (rokchik @ Dec 12 2007, 09:28 PM) *
Good for you man. Metal fans do get a bad rep don't they?
laugh.gif laugh.gif laugh.gif


yeah, whatever I don't see why other people care about what I (anyone) likes. Good story lol


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drummingguitaris...
post Dec 13 2007, 03:49 AM
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I judge everyone's playing as if they are better than me, because I have a pretty low self-esteem about myself...considering one of my friends who influenced me can rip off any Mark Tremonti solo perfectly on the spot...it's scary.


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JVM
post Dec 13 2007, 03:56 AM
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I proudly wear my opeth shirt and I have only gotten compliments (it helps to be really really ridiculously good looking of course) for it. I'm sorry to hear about all these idiotic, small minded and sexist people out there, but I'm also glad that a good helping of GMC has proven them wrong smile.gif


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PlayAllDay
post Dec 13 2007, 03:57 AM
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You are the greatest Rokchik! I wish I had been there to see it for sure. Your set list sounded really cool and you had to pick em and play even in the midst of all that emotion - awesome.
I get so sick of being stereotyped, we shouldn't do it to each other people...but we do sad.gif


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Saoirse O'Shea
post Dec 13 2007, 10:25 AM
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Superb reaction from you RokChik - don't get mad get even smile.gif .

Sadly there are an awful lot of misogynists in the music industry - perhaps more then in many others, for some reason it seems to attract them. The upside is that not only are they stupid (and can only think with their proverbials) but more often then not are talentless wannabies. It's an industry that, imo, too often sets too much store on appearance and is too quick to stereotype.

One experience of mine from the music industry - years ago I was in a band and we had an upcoming very brief slot on TV to play (ok mime) to our new record. TV director meets our manager just before shooting and they talk for a while. Our manager comes to us and tells us that the director doesn't want the keyboard player on stage for filming as, 'he's fat and scruffy and looks like s*** guys - you'll lose a lot of teenbopper sales.' We walked out of the studio and didn't play. Manager the next day told us to 'wise up boys if you want to sell records.' Me, the bass player and the keyboard player quit the group that day and went off and started another.

Outside of the music industry I work in higher education in a university Business School. The previous head of School used to come in to work, pass me in the corridor but would never say hello. One day he stopped me and wished me a good morning. I thought it was strange and asked a friend why. 'XX - the Dean- thought you were a student because of the way you dress and because you have long hair. He saw your latest book and asked YY who the author was and you were pointed out. Now he knows you're staff.'

I have long hair and wear jeans and usually a t shirt, very often a band one - my new Dean hates this, she particularly hates my Carcass T-Shirt tongue.gif . This in a School where the other academics tend to power dress in suits. They all do these clever lectures based on Powerpoint slides full of little bullet points. I go in, sit on a desk and talk, write on the board and debate things with the students. One of my Masters graduates summed up his reaction to the difference here - 'They look the business but know nothing. You may be scruffy but I don't care as when you speak you know the business.'

So again well done and kudos Rokchik and Uncreator- you handled the jerks in the best way possible, shouldn't matter what your gender is, what you look like, what you wear, just 'Shut up and play yer guitar' (Zappa again ) smile.gif

Cheers,
Tony


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rokchik
post Dec 13 2007, 01:29 PM
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QUOTE (PlayAllDay @ Dec 12 2007, 10:57 PM) *
You are the greatest Rokchik! I wish I had been there to see it for sure. Your set list sounded really cool and you had to pick em and play even in the midst of all that emotion - awesome.
I get so sick of being stereotyped, we shouldn't do it to each other people...but we do sad.gif


Thanks PAD smile.gif

The list of songs wasn't that hard to come up with to be honest....it's the songs I usually play when I pick up an acoustic. With the exception of the last two, I just wanted to stick it to buddy verbally without getting too rowdy tongue.gif To be honest I wanted to put my fist through him but that would have turned a bad situation even worse.
To make this story even more interesting, I found out this morning that this guy is playing in our weekly game of shiny hockey on Saturday. If he didn't think I could play guitar wait until he sees me on skates...I'm a much better hockey player then guitar player believe me smile.gif Our shiny games can get pretty rough so hopefully he can stand being checked by a girl smile.gif biggrin.gif laugh.gif

@Tony - Kudos to you for sticking with your friends and putting what's right above all else. I think that kind of loyalty is very rare these days.
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